Catz

हब्सी धावक

एउटा खेलाडीले आफ्नो गुरुलाई सोध्यो हब्सी धावकहरु किन यति घेरै च्याम्पियन हुन्छन् - दौडमा फर्स्ट भएन भने नुहाउनु पर्छ भनेर कोचले उनिहरुलाई भनेका हुन्छन त्यसैले गुरुले उत्तर दियो।

पसले

एक दिन एउटा पसले मरेछ , यमराजको अगाडी पुगेपछि यमराजले पसलेलाई सोधेछ,’ भन् तिमी कहाँ जान चाहान्छौ ? पसले,’ म स्वर्ग पनि जान चाहान्न र नर्क पनि जान चाहान्न , बरु म (स्वर्ग र नर्कको) बिचमै बस्छु र पसल थाप्छु अनि दुबैतिरको ग्राहक मेरो पसलमा आँउछन् ।

६४ वटा दाँत

तीन चार जना मध्ये दुई जना झगडा गरिरहेका थिए । पहिलोले भन्दै थियो ,’ एक बक्सिङ्ग हानेर तेरो ६४ वटै दाँत भुँईमा खसाली दिन्छु । झगडा नगरेको अर्कोले हाँस्दै प्याच भन्यो ,’ मान्छेको पनि ६४ वटा दाँत हुन्छ र ??’ ‘चुप लाग !! त बिचमा बोल्छस् भन्ने थाहा भएर तेरो दाँत पनि अगाडीनै गनेको हो ।’ पहिलो भन्यो ।

जिन्दगी है छोटी हर पल मे खुश रहो...

जिन्दगि है छोटी हर पल मे खुश रहो...
ऑफ़िस मे खुश रहो, घर मे खुश रहो..
आज पनीर नही है, दाल मे ही खुश रहो,
आज जीम जाने क समय नही, दो कदम चल के ही खुश रहो..
आज दोस्तों का साथ नही, TV देख के ही खुश रहो..

आज कोइ नाराज़ है, उसके इस अंदाज़ मे भी खुश रहो..
ज़िसे देख नही सकते उसकी आवाज़ मे ही खुश रहो...
ज़िसे पा नही सकते उसके याद मे ही खुश रहो...
SW करने का सोचा था, Civil मे ही खुश रहो...
Laptop ना मिला तो क्या, Desktop मे ही खुश रहो..
बीता हुआ कल जा चुका है, उसकी मीठी यादे है, उनमे ही खुश रहो..
आने वाले पल का पता नही.. सपनो मे ही खुश रहो...
हसते हसते ये पल बितायेंगे, आज मे ही खुश रहो...
जिन्दगी है छोटी, हर पल मे खुश रहो.....!!

Me & My Boss

When I take a long time to finish, I am slow,
When my boss takes a long time, He is thorough
When I don't do it, I am lazy,
When my boss does not do it, He is busy,
When I do something without being told, I am trying to be smart,
When my boss does the same, He takes the initiative,
When I please my boss, I am apple polishing,
When my boss pleases his boss, He is cooperating,
When I make a mistake, You're an idiot.
When my boss makes a mistake, He's only human.
When I am out of the office, I am wondering around.
When my boss is out of the office, He's on business.
When I am on a day off sick, I am always sick.
When my boss is a day off sick, He must be very ill.
When I apply for leave, I must be going for an interview
When my boss applies for leave, It's because he's overworked
When I do well, My boss never remembers,
When I do wrong, He never forgets

$100

In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing young girl. The four passengers join in conversation, which very soon turns to the erotic. Then, the young girl proposes, "If each of you will give me $1.00, I will show you my legs."

The men, charmed by this young girl, all pull a buck out of their wallet. And then the girl pulls up her dress a bit to show her legs. Then she says, "If each of you gentlemen will give me $10.00, I'll show you my thighs,".

And men being what they are, they all pull out a ten dollar bill. The girl pulls up her dress all the way to her legs in full. Conversation continues, and the men, a bit excited, have all taken off their coats. Then the young girl says, "If you will give me $100, I will show you where I was operated on for appendicitis."

All three fork over the money. The girl then turned to the window and points outside at a building they're passing. "See there in the distance. That's the hospital where I had it done!"